art's not all shiny and happy

When I decided to start this blog, my glossy intention was to create a bridge between a professional career as an interior designer and my interest as an art educator. Admittedly, there were shiny happy thoughts of me flitting over the void and becoming a perky art teacher.

OK, I'm past perky.

Shiny and happy aren't exactly where life's at for me now either. My mother has a terminal illness. Her quality of life has been compromised for years. Seemingly, it's dwindling even more rapidly now. All of this saddens me. And, as these life situations happen, family dynamics are also exasperated. This part is painful.

The other day I caught myself in a spiral of self-doubt. Busying myself with household chores, I was going nowhere but down. Somehow I caught myself and took a peak at my sketch book. There lie the beginnings of a neglected birthday card. I decided to pick up were I left off and complete it. As soon as I made that decision, I felt my energy shift. Confidence was re-instated. This is art in action.

To my dear friend Amy, thank you for the inspiration. Sorry you never got the original card. You are always in my heart and always fabulous. To the new quadragenarian, Happy Birthday! and thanks for your good energy. To anyone having a hard time dealing with me right now, well...

Have your psychologist call my psychologist. I'll be in the studio. Doing the best I can.

1,088 screws

Numbing? Soothing? (By the way, this is a family channel ;)

We all bear pain in our lives. I'd like to believe that we are given what we can handle. But, How do we handle it? So often we resort to compulsions and addictions that merely reinforce the pain.  What is it that draws us to make the same decision of regret. Is the repetition and familiarity of the outcome comforting?

It is awfully brave to face our pain and walk through it. It is probably the more healthy choice too. We don't always have the luxury of that choice. On occasion, the pain really is too much. At these times, anaesthasia is a survival mechanism that works.

Consider productive forms of anaesthesia. Consider art. To refine your art, often repetition is required. Miniscule details need addressed, over and over. Be it music, writing, sculpting, running, cooking.... The body and mind need to absorb the exercise into your muscular and nervous system in order to make it a part of your being. At other times, a project just needs excessive, minute attention. Either way, here's a chance to sooth yourself without robbing your soul.

Let your body and mind find comfort in the exercise. Focus on the repeat. Let yourself be lost in the task. Let yourself be part of the art of healing. Something good may come of it.